Are you, or someone you care about, struggling to overcome the temptation of pornography?
Though there is some debate about porn addiction is a real addiction (I will cover this idea in a later post), all of us know people (or perhaps you are the person) who has difficulty staying,"NO." This is problematic because there is substantial research that shows that the best way to break free from the power of pornography is to quit using it.
NOW wait a second, don't freak out on me. I know that the last sentence sounds obvious, and it may sound like I am making light of the situation. Let me assure you that nothing could be further from the truth. You see when you use pornography, your brain develops pathways. The more you use it, the harder it hard to say "NO." However, unlike a broken arm or cancer cells, which require medical assistance, the first steps of re-wiring your thoughts and habits is to step away from porn. Our brains are amazing. In time they can repair themselves. This means that, if you will step away from porn use, in time, you will experience less temptation and freedom will become part of your everyday life.
It won't be easy, most people I know who try to step away, face a real struggle. It is a fight with many knock-downs and disappointments. Walking away first requires you to make a personal decision. Choosing to step away. However, this decision usually requires asking for help. I know, no-one wants to admit to this kind of problem. It is embarrassing. It feels “unmanly” or weak. But, in my experience, working with lots of young men and women, I have seen that success requires two things: (1) personal commitment and a desire for freedom, and (2) a support system, people who are committed and are unwilling to let you slide without a fight.
Who should you ask for help? Here is a list of the type of people you need:
1. A professional - Look, if you are in over your head, if you can't figure things out on your own, you may need to reach out to a counselor of a therapist. Someone trained and experienced. You would do this for your car or another serious issue. Some people are trained to assist you in breaking free from porn.
2. A group - It helps to know that you are not alone. Find a group that you can lean into and find support. This can be on online support group (though if you have an internet addiction, I highly recommend you avoid this in the beginning). It can be a group from a church or even a formal support group.
3. A friend - you need someone — preferably same gender — who will hear your confessions and still look you in the eye. Someone you can call at midnight for support and someone who is equally unimpressed and will call out your BS when you start whining.
If you, or someone you love, is battling with pornography, I have written a book that can help.
Bondage and Freedom: Escaping the Trap of Pornography is now available at Amazon.com. Click HERE to see the listing.
Pick up a copy and feel free to let other's know as well.
Click HERE to get book from Amazon